The true meaning of Christmas

December is nearly here and we all know what that means. Christmas is nearly upon us. I have to admit Christmas is one of my most favourite times of year. I love everything about the winter months. Maybe not so much the freezing toes that feel like they have succumbed to frostbite but everything else I definitely love. The frosty mornings that look so beautiful, the hot chocolates, cosying up in chunky jumpers, watching Christmas movies and just the feeling of excitement and anticipation that seems to fill the air in December.

I know for a lot of people Christmas means gifts and the excitement of exchanging and receiving, and I absolutely have been one of those people in the past- now I'm not so much. A combination of getting older and having children has changed me. Now I sit and reminisce about days when I was younger and even Christmases at home in my early 20s and the things the I remember and treasure the most from those days are the times and the moments we were all together. I couldn't tell you what I received at any given year but what I could tell you about are the drives over the country roads in the snow to see my granny, coming home on Christmas eve night in the freezing cold after midnight mass to cosy up in front of the fire and have a drink or nibbles with all of us around, eating mummys turkey curry after boxing day after a night out. Christmas is about the people not the things. What I would do to go back and enjoy one more Christmas like that just to really savour it all. It's true what they say that as you get older you realise that the things you really want for Christmas are things that money cant buy.

This Christmas I am off- anybody who works in the health care sector will tell you how precious that is. You either have to be on maternity leave or actually be dead to be off this time of year. So I plan to enjoy every single minute. I want to spend it with my little family,  making our traditions, our memories that we will treasure in the years to come. I don't want it to ever be about the presents.  I'm not a scrooge by any means, I love to treat people but these days it's less about wasting money on impulse purchases and more about spending time with the ones we love. Sure getting a wee gift is lovely but I truly believe that it gets a bit too much- sometimes I think we get so hung up on the presents when really all we need to have a 'wonderful' Christmas is each other. Life shouldn't be about the things.

I know many years ahead there'll be Christmases when Aoibhin and Cathal will be off travelling, living life, making their own memories so now is my time to make our memories together, because I want them to look back on Christmases at home with their Mummy and Daddy the way I do and think of the fun, the laughter, the togetherness.  That is what Christmas is about for me.

oh and new pyjamas of course.

Autumn Vibes

If pushed came to shove I would have to say that Autumn is my favourite season. When I think of Autumn, warm knits, conkers, hot chocolate, crunchy leaves all jump to mind. There is no better feeling than cosying up in front of a fire, with a hot drink and cosy knee high socks on. Yes to knee high socks season! Its totally a thing.

Last year I had some lovely days with Aoibhín in the park, the weather was mild but dry and our local park was just beautiful and awash with so many colours that just sum Autumn up. This year I have two wee ones by my side and I am so looking forward to many days out with them.  It's also the perfect excuse to purchase a few new warm knits ( Because you can never have too many right?) and mine were well and truly stretched this time last year accommodating the wee man so I need some new chunky jumpers in my life.

I can not wait to walk amongst the crunchy leaves, the darker evenings and just everything that Autumn brings with it. Do you love Autumn as much as me?

Easy Peasy Lemon Drizzle

I love baking. Admittedly my skills are limited to a certain few things but still it's all practice isn't it?. One of my tried and tested bakes is the simple and easy lemon drizzle cake. Who doesn't love a bit of zesty lemon?.

This recipe is foolproof and it's so delicious- Here's the recipe if you feel like dusting off the apron and doing a bit of baking.

Here is what you'll need : 225g unsalted butter plus extra for greasing your tin, 2 lemons (grated- I finely grate but up to yourself), 175g caster sugar, 4 eggs, 1 tbsp. baking powder.

For the Syrup you'll need juice of one lemon and 150g caster sugar- additional rind of lemon to decorate if you so wish!.

So firstly, the usual - preheat the oven ( about 160 mark) grease you tins and line with baking parchment or don't whatever works for you!. Mix the grated rind of two lemons with the caster sugar, then add the butter. I use my mixer for this, until the mixture is soft and creamy but if you like getting down and dirty then use your hands. Next beat in the 4 eggs, one at a time, sift the flour in, usually in about 2-3 batches rather than all at once- then when its all evenly mixed pour into your tin. Seriously easy. Bake for about an hour and half or adjust to your preference- nicely browned on top and stick a skewer in just to check the mixture has cooked through.

For the syrup simply mix the sugar and juice of a lemon slowly on low heat- add more lemon if you like a bit of extra zest. Make a few indent sin cake and pour over the syrup so it all trickles into the cake, then decorate as you wish!.

Could it be any easier? Next on my baking agenda is a chocolate cake  for a certain someones birthday!

Hope you enjoy!

Let Them Be Little

'No don't touch those stones-they're dirty'
'no don't you'll get your clothes dirty'
'don't run, you'll fall'

I often wonder when people make comments like these towards my not even 2 year old daughter, is it because they have forgotten what it is like to be little? To find amazement and enjoyment in every little thing. The world is full of so many new wonders for these inquisitive little eyes and hands, and I absolutely want my daughter to explore and experience it all. She doesn't need to be held back, or told not to for fear of getting 'dirty'.

They're only so little, so young and innocent for so long. One day splashing in dirty puddles or lifting handfuls of mud wont hold the same appeal to them. I for one, don't want that day to come. To see the smile on her little face as she runs repeatedly up and down the same muddy puddle until she is soaked through, or picks up another stone to give to mummy is magical. I love to see that smile. That's what childhood is all about. Beauty in the ordinary.

So what if she gets dirty - clothes can be changed, a little dirt never hurt anyone. Let her climb gates, climb the frames at the park, let her run without telling her to 'Watch' and telling her she will hurt herself. Don't teach her to be fearful or full of trepidation.  Children fall, they get dirty, wet,. Grazed knees and palms and soaking socks are a rite of passage growing up. I don't want my children to grow up timid or fearful of new experiences because they have been told 'No' one too many times. Encourage them in their wild, care free ways. I want them to feel free, to enjoy the rush of excitement at doing things that evoke enjoyment, that spark their creative outlet. Children need freedom and boundaries, often in equal measure and I will ensure that they have both but never will I compromise on letting them be little.

I'm fortunate that I live in the country, we go for a walk almost every day. We jump in puddles, we collect stones and twigs. We lie in the fields and dig our hands into muddy puddles. It's good for the soul, it's great for their development and creative and social skills. It's great to get fresh air. Most of all it's good to let them be little. They only stay that way for such a little time. Soon they'll find other things to entertain themselves - I plan on letting my children be little for as long as possible. If that means extra laundry and dirty little pawprints then so be it. I hope that by allowing them the freedom to just 'be' now, that I am shaping them in to being 'who' they want to be when they are older. Young adults not afraid of trying new things, of getting their hands dirty in every sense of the word, of never being fearful or timid about joining in on activities.

So let them be little, and let them explore. The world has time enough for them to be older and full of responsibilities. Now is our time to make memories.

Some things only last a short time because they are so precious. So let them be little.

.

Words to my little Girl

I''ve blinked my eyes and this little madam is fast approaching two years old. Recently she has become even more affectionate- every night she reaches up and gives me a big bear hug and relaxes into my arms and tonight as I looked down at my little girl I realised that soon there will come a day when she is a teenager, a young woman and she wont fit in my arms like that anymore. A thought that really made me sad. Her feisty, stubborn and determined little character is really starting to shine through. She is happy, free spirited and fearless . She is afraid of nothing, as she danders off into the sea at the beach or climbs across the playground ropes without being fazed by the drop below. This makes me proud and fearful in equal measure. I want to instill so many things within her and know the balance of when to step back and let her learn and explore whilst mindful of her safety without coming across as stifling or over cautious. So my little girl, here are just a few words for you.

I want you to be adventurous and to try new things, to never feel timid or intimidated by anything or anyone. To know that if you want to do something that you can do it. To know that everything worth having is worth working hard for. I want you to travel, explore the world, seize every opportunity that comes your way because sometimes things can pass you by. At the same time I want you to know that it is ok if things don't happen the way you want or have planned. Sometimes Life isn't like that. But that you know it will all work itself out in the end.

I want you to keep being feisty and stubborn and voice those opinions, but to always do so in a kind manner. What you say will be forgotten but the way you make others feel will stay with them. To be aware that no matter how hurtful others can be that you can always rise above. To know that in order to succeed you don't have to knock someone else down on the way. I want you to be gracious and proud and humble. To offer a helping hand to others. But to always look after yourself too. Don't follow the crowd. Do your own thing, always what you believe is right. Stand up for your beliefs

I want you to know how beautiful you are, in every way. That your worth or capability is not determined soley by your pretty smile. To always love yourself even when you don't feel like it. to know that you are absolutely perfect, though you might not see it. To know your worth and not feel the need to have that validated by anyone. To Always be kind to yourself. Love yourself. All of you.

I want you to laugh, cry , love, make mistakes, learn from them, explore, seek adventures, be kind, compassionate and thoughtful. But you are already these and so much more.

Most of all I want you to know how loved you are. Every single day. Mo matter what you will always have a place right here in mummy's arms. A place that you can always call home. For you will always be my baby.

National Trust days out

Day trips out take on a new dimension when you have a family- with 2 small children we want somewhere that we can go and get lost in and spend a good portion of the day. When you are packing the car as if you are heading away for a fortnight the last thing you want to be doing is trawling the prams in and out of the car at various stops throughout the day- what we want is one place we can head to, unpack and spend a good few hours just roaming and little little miss run wild.

I have heard of The Argory over the years, ( outside the Moy) but have never been to it, so when we were deciding where to go for a day trip we settled on this for a Sunday day out. As part of the national trust properties, we knew to expect roaming grounds and picturesque views and we were not disappointed. Driving up the lane you are immediately greeted by the beautiful Irish gentry house surrounded by gardens.

The stunning house is set amongst 320 acres of land so there is plenty of space to roam. There are some beautiful walks including the lime tree walk- a beautiful trail set off by the endless lime trees along its path. There is also the stunning River walk - a good 2 mile scenic stroll. Both are suitable for prams so no excuses!.

As well as the beautiful walks there is the most amazing Rose Garden that is just overflowing with pink roses. It is just total garden envy. There is also a great adventure play area for the wee ones- plenty to keep them entertained, and there is also a zipline which I think Myself and my husband had the most fun on! Definitely not just for kids.

The main Courtyard itself houses the Gift Shop, Coffee Shop and the old stables and a little bookshop. There's also stables for the kids to 'muck out' complete with wheelbarrows, brushes, spades and hay. Great wee added feature to keep the little ones entertained.

We went on a Sunday so there was Live Music in the courtyard and a BBQ which was lovely and really added to the atmosphere. There is also the little coffee shop to avail of some treats if you wish- there are areas on the grounds for picnics and when we go next time we will most definitely bring one with us because I just think there's nothing better than a good picnic and tea from a flask- sure isn't that the best part. We availed of the bbq on this occasion. and whilst it was lovely- it was £4 for a plain burger; which I think is a little steep ( but then I'm a savvy shopper these days with 2 children)- just something to bear in mind if you have a larger family than ours as it would add up. So picnic up is my advice.

So if you are from around this part of the world I would totally recommend a visit, We will definitely be back and we have also invested in a membership for the year and plan to make the most of it.

Directions wise the Argory is approximately 45 minutes from Belfast and Banbridge direction, 20 minutes thereabouts from Armagh direction. They have the .' Lazy Sundays' on throughout July and August and the live music is great. so there you have it- The Argory- our first experience with a National Trust day out and most surely not our last.

In the Eye of the Beholder

Motherhood is a tough gig, we all , as women, I think are just designed to always be hard on ourselves. To always doubt ourselves, judge ourselves and generally just be harsh on ourselves. Are we doing enough? Are we present enough, shout too much, patient enough...I mean the list goes on and on. As if that wasn't enough we then criticise every inch of our bodies- constantly putting ourselves down for our 'mummy tummies' or mourning the body we once knew and loved. That's an awful lot of negativity and pressure we put on ourselves. There's always another mummy we compare ourselves too and think 'If only I was as slim/pretty/well dressed as her...'. We really are our own worst enemy.

I've met some lovely mummies since I began this crazy journey and over the course of our friendships we all have shared the things we dislike about ourselves -things that we try to disguise, or distract attention from. Things that make us feel vulnerable and inadequate. We all have insecurities.
This past week, I was fortunate to meet some of the mummies I have become friends with, and afterwards it really got me thinking about how we all perceive ourselves. What is that old saying...Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder?...well it couldn't be more true. People don't see you the way you have perceived yourself in your mind. They don't see the areas or the features you dislike so immensely. What I see, and what I saw this week, were pretty smiles, a gentle manner, funny and witty personalities, interesting people with kind, genuine hearts. Such pretty and kind women, who really are too harsh on themselves. It really made me realise that the warped view we hold of ourselves is so far from other peoples perceptions of us.

It's so easy to fall into the trap of putting yourself down and highlighting what you think are your worst bits when in reality they have probably gone entirely unnoticed by others. It's time we were all more confident, more proud, more empowered. People remember you for how you make them feel, not for how you looked. Maybe we should all go a little easier on ourselves and embrace and celebrate the things we love about ourselves. Whether that's a compassionate nature, a warm smile, the ability to put someone else at ease or make someone laugh- those are the things we should be embracing. All the rest is just superficial really, and things that can be worked on if you really want to. But be proud of you. Those are some of the things I particularly want to instill in my daughter as she grows up - that she is so much more than just a pretty face, that she has so much more to offer the world. I don't want her to ever feel like her worth is based on how other people perceive her, especially not based on looks alone.

So embrace everything about you- even what you consider to be your flaws- because they could just be the very thing that somebody finds endearing about you.

Mummys Need Looking after too

Being a mummy is possibly the hardest job in the world- you literally give it your all. Physically, emotionally, mentally- the sleep deprivation, the tantrums, the restless nights when little ones are sick, the constant need to entertain, to provide, to care - not to mention the endless guilt that you just could have gave more or done something a little better, been a little more patient, a little more observant or focused on them.  Of course, that's just me rhyming off the hard parts but then there's the moments everyday that make you remember that it is all so worth it, the smiles, the giggles, the little hand reached up to you when no one else will do but mummy. The innocence and the joy that you get to witness through their eyes. There is no better feeling...But it is still hard and it is so important to look after yourself too.

You cant give it your all every single day, running on empty. You have to stop and recharge. Take a moment and just breathe. I'm learning that more than ever now. I want to be the best I can be and I've realised that in order to do that I need to be kind to myself too, take a bit of time for just me, do something that makes me feel like 'me'. It will make all the difference. Having said that its not easy to step back and allow yourself time out from mummy duties- there never seems to be a minute in the day for anything else but simply getting through the day with 2 little ones, particularly if like me you solo parent a large portion of the week. But, I'm really trying to grasp the concept that you can't pour from an empty cup and trying to implement it into my life. Because I do try and do it all, for many reasons- I want to but also because with my other half away a lot, I feel like I should be the constant in their lives by being there whenever they need me, any time they need me, and I feel guilty for not being there. Doesn't every parent feel guilty constantly?




Guilt aside, I know how important it is to look after yourself and take time out.  For me, that is something as simple as sitting down with a magazine in peace and quiet, lighting one of my favourite candles, buying myself flowers, or new shoes ( maybe a pair too many but Neil never needs to know that), or even just going for a walk where the sole purpose is not just to entertain a toddler and stop to look at every stone ( as much as I love those walks too). Going for a cup of tea, getting your hair done or even just putting on makeup. Just doing something for yourself. Putting yourself first just for a small period of time.

Ask me who my favourite people are to spend time with and I will always say my children and husband, but I also like to spend time with myself. I enjoy my own company. That means allowing myself that time and not feeling guilty for it. I give everything I have to be a mummy, so I think its ok to give myself a bit of my own time too.

Being a mummy is the best job in he world, but even us mummys' need time out too. Take the time mummies-we all deserve it.

Another year older

So another year older- last year on my birthday I had a 9 month old, this year I have a 4 month old and a 19 month old. Gone are the days of celebrating my birthday by heading out to the pub and raising a few too many glasses to my big day. Nowadays  am happiest spending the day with my little family. Spending your day with the ones you love sure isn't that what its all about?.

We didn't really have any specific plans, we just packed up the car, with picnic in tow and headed towards Belfast direction. Neil had said he was treating me to a day of shopping but I didn't want to waste the day trailing the two wee ones around shops- its hardly a day out for them, so I mentioned Streamvale Farm- a place we had kept meaning to go to and always left it too late in the day. So we thought today was the day!. and what a place it is- there is so much to do and see, we spent well over 3 hours there and reluctantly left as Little Miss hadn't napped and we all know how that can go...but a fun time was had by all before we left.

There is so much to see and do- some many different animals,  feeding times to allow the children the chance to feed the lambs, pony rides, tractor rides. There are lots of play areas for the children to get messy and you'll often find the parents enjoying it more ( daddy had to be prised away from the mechanical diggers). There was a lovely little nature trail with descriptions along the way making it all seem so magical and exciting.

There is a lovely little café, but also picnic areas where we enjoyed a lovely cup of tea- there's nothing quite as nice as tea from a flask is there?. Parking was free which is great, coupled with the fact you can bring your own food- plus under 3's go free so just over £7 each for us parents and it was a great cheap and extremely fun day out.  I think we enjoyed it just as much as Aoibhin.

There really is no better way to spend your birthday is there. These are the days I'll remember later in life- the days that cost nothing, but that hold the most memories-  the cups of tea and homemade sandwiches, watching Aoibhin be so excited and care free, laughing and making stories to be told in years to come.

One of my best Birthdays yet. Family time is the best time.