Being a mummy is possibly the hardest job in the world- you literally give it your all. Physically, emotionally, mentally- the sleep deprivation, the tantrums, the restless nights when little ones are sick, the constant need to entertain, to provide, to care - not to mention the endless guilt that you just could have gave more or done something a little better, been a little more patient, a little more observant or focused on them. Of course, that's just me rhyming off the hard parts but then there's the moments everyday that make you remember that it is all so worth it, the smiles, the giggles, the little hand reached up to you when no one else will do but mummy. The innocence and the joy that you get to witness through their eyes. There is no better feeling...But it is still hard and it is so important to look after yourself too.
You cant give it your all every single day, running on empty. You have to stop and recharge. Take a moment and just breathe. I'm learning that more than ever now. I want to be the best I can be and I've realised that in order to do that I need to be kind to myself too, take a bit of time for just me, do something that makes me feel like 'me'. It will make all the difference. Having said that its not easy to step back and allow yourself time out from mummy duties- there never seems to be a minute in the day for anything else but simply getting through the day with 2 little ones, particularly if like me you solo parent a large portion of the week. But, I'm really trying to grasp the concept that you can't pour from an empty cup and trying to implement it into my life. Because I do try and do it all, for many reasons- I want to but also because with my other half away a lot, I feel like I should be the constant in their lives by being there whenever they need me, any time they need me, and I feel guilty for not being there. Doesn't every parent feel guilty constantly?
Guilt aside, I know how important it is to look after yourself and take time out. For me, that is something as simple as sitting down with a magazine in peace and quiet, lighting one of my favourite candles, buying myself flowers, or new shoes ( maybe a pair too many but Neil never needs to know that), or even just going for a walk where the sole purpose is not just to entertain a toddler and stop to look at every stone ( as much as I love those walks too). Going for a cup of tea, getting your hair done or even just putting on makeup. Just doing something for yourself. Putting yourself first just for a small period of time.
Ask me who my favourite people are to spend time with and I will always say my children and husband, but I also like to spend time with myself. I enjoy my own company. That means allowing myself that time and not feeling guilty for it. I give everything I have to be a mummy, so I think its ok to give myself a bit of my own time too.
Being a mummy is the best job in he world, but even us mummys' need time out too. Take the time mummies-we all deserve it.
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